Dating can be a very troublesome and stressful experience, especially for those of us who are not in tune with its special language. Silent movements can say volumes while ordinary phrases in normal conversation can take on entirely different meanings in the context of attraction. For example, males, have you ever found yourself day dreaming about a smile you received from a beautiful woman only later to discover it was merely her attempt at appeasement? Or to the females, have you ever found yourself enthralled by a handsome man’s attention only to later realize it was addressed toward your best friend? These two small examples are obviously the tip of the ice berg and represent one of the fascinating aspects of dating and relationships: They have their own language. With that in mind, I would like to start a series on various non-verbal communication cues a person may experience during the course of dating. I shall start simply by defining the Nod and a Spat.
The Nod: The gesture is used and understood in various ways in the realm of dating. Specifically, however, its niche is found in the realms of mount testosterone. This gesture is used by males in the event that all other forms of communication fail. This gesture is also used by males if all other forms of communication were to succeed. If you really think about it, many males that exist do not even utter words. The all encompassing nod is their greeting, cry for help, pick up line, method of ordering at a drive through, mating call, make up technique, way of confession, baseball signal, farewell, etc. In other words, if you are ever in doubt when trying to communicate with a male, just smile and nod and every thing will be ok.
A Spat: Contrary to popular belief and common usage, this is not the noun form of the past tensed verb of spitting. Rather, it is an encounter between the male and female in a relationship in which there is a verbal exchange carrying negative connotations which could then adversely affect the couple by way of deteriorating their desire to communicate with one another. This subversion of communication can lead to a spiraling schizogenesis which would inevitably destroy the relationship. There is hope, however. The opportunity of escape from harm proceeds immediately after the second wave of verbal exchange in which the female then sits exasperated with her hands limp in her lap and her arms tucked close to her side in a defensive position. It is at this point that she is thinking, “I wish he would hold me.” If the male interprets this kinesic message properly he may respond accordingly and hold her. Thus, he completes a successful manipulation tactic making the female believe that he really cares for her and her feelings.