As the third week of the year’s opening month crawls near, inaugural goals enthusiastically set for 2010 already are waning.
It is a common phenomena and frustration, according to experts across the country, who say that most all New Year’s resolutions are useless if the person setting the goal does not understand or commit to the change.
Among the top of such resolutions is weight loss, and for the plus-size community, the pressure to shed extra pounds is even greater.
“Sometimes we believe in our society that happiness has a look,” said Andrea Scott, an Atlanta-based psychotherapist and women’s empowerment coach, who discourages her clients from setting New Years resolutions. “We need to see you happy and smiling at a size 16, 18 or a 20,” Scott said. “We need to constantly be redefining how happiness looks.”
Scott said the pressure and the problem is the result of commercialism and the fact that, “mainstream fashion magazines define what’s beautiful.” Couple that with unrealistic New Year goals, and the result is “a vicious cycle” of failure.
“Four to six weeks in, you’re realizing that you’ve already failed. Now you’re depressed and now you’re returning to those habits that got you where you are in the first place.”
Veteran life and health coach Joyce Dillon said the impetus of frustration from abandoned resolutions comes from a lack of understanding about one’s self.
“You’ve got to figure out what is going on in your life that you don’t already have what It is that you want,” Dillon said, who is the CEO of Atlanta-based Healthy Living and Balance, a coaching, training and personal development company. “A lot of people feel like they are a victim, like they have no control over what is happening in their life. You’ve got to get out of that mindset.”
Dillon offered three main tips for a healthy body image:
1. Be aware of what you are eating. Ask yourself, “Are my cabinets and refrigerator filled with unhealthy food?”
2. Determine one thing you can do to start to change. Simply put, start slow.
3. Watch what you say to yourself about yourself. If you look in the mirror everyday and say, “God, I’m fat”, you are just putting back into your mind and body negativity.
Scott, who describes herself as a “laws of attraction believer”, had similar advice and said that “what people give attention to is what they receive.”
“When we are in the mirror focusing on our love handles, our bellies, our thighs, that’s the energy that we’re putting out there. It’s at that point that we start to appreciate our bodies is when we can gain control over it and mold it into what we want it to be.”
Both women are proponents of a healthy lifestyle regardless of the size.
“I know a lot of bigger women who are plus-size, and they still eat healthy and exercise. If plus-size is your natural Godly body then that’s fine. I like women who look like themselves who are natural and feel great about it and be who we are.”
ABOUT OUR EXPERTS
See Andrea Scott, MS, NCC, LAPC, this Saturday, Jan. 9, from Noon to 2 PM for her Vision-Building Workshop from 12-2 PM in Atlanta. Visit her website for more information.
Joyce Dillon, RN, M.N frequently hosts retreats and workshops in Atlanta and across the country. Visit her website for more information on her services.
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