A recent People magazine article reported that Tiger Woods has checked into a sex rehab center in an attempt to save his failing marriage. What some would consider the “unforgiveable” sin seems to be up-for-discussion with his wife whose image we recall as the woman who chased after her husband and beat his car with a golf club after learning about one of his former lovers.
If she does return, it’s not the first time the wife of a high-profile man has taken back her cheating spouse. John Edwards has finally admitted not only to an affair, but also agrees that his wanderings produced a baby daughter. In his case, he’s not only in trouble with his wife but also with the law as they investigate whether he used campaign funds to pay the rent on million dollar homes for his second family.
Should a cheater always be kicked to the curb?
The rules of relationships change when it involves children and marriage. It’s devastating anytime someone you love stomps on your heart and cheats with someone else. But you have invested differently in each type of relationship and a boyfriend is easier to tell “goodbye” or even replace than the man you are tied to and with whom you’ve made a home.
It shows wisdom to leave, but the question is whether or not to go back. Typically, if a man cheats before he’s married then it will always be a fear and create an issue of trust. If he cheats after marriage, it may be in YOUR best interest to try and come to terms with it if he is remorseful and is willing to put in the work to get you back.
The dating vs. marriage difference
Women will drive themselves crazy trying to figure out why their lover wandered, what they need to think about is what’s best for themselves at this point. And that takes space. Married women often make the choice to try and save their marriage not necessarily because it’s what they naturally want to do. Rather it’s because it may be the best choice in the long run.
Severing a marriage isn’t easy. For married women, this is the man your financially tied to, emotionally invested in to a higher degree, and may even have created a family with. Even if you walk away, it’s likely you will still be in contact with the father of your children.
Single, dating relationships have a higher degree of independence that has been maintained. It’s easier to pick up and keep going. It’s also likely to have been a shorter relationship than a marriage and possibly still in the “getting-to-know-you” stages. You can save yourself the heartbreak of marital infidelity by making the choice to run now instead of letting things linger.
In the end, whether Mrs. Woods returns or decides her marriage is irreparable, we need not judge her final decision. Just trust it’s a choice made for the best interest of both herself and her young children.