Here are your comics for the week. Seeing as it’s now 2010 and all, I should inform you that scientists have found that procuring these titles will not, in fact, fill the gaping hole in your soul. Ut oh, comics:
B.P.R.D: King of Fear #1 (of 5)
B.P.R.D.’s insistence on publishing as miniseries seems quite silly when you consider how quickly one series is started after the last one just finished. This latest story takes the team to the site of the events of B.P.R.D.: Hollow Earth in a quest to annihilate once and for all those pesky frog monster things that have been popping up ever since the very first Hellboy miniseries hit the shelves. Also, as the gorgeous Mike Mignola cover would suggest, Johann Kraus is still possessed by the spirit of that early-twentieth century superhero we know as LobJohn. Hey, at least it’s better than him being possessed by the voice of Seth MacFarlane in Hellboy II: The Golden Army. Fashionable “Family Guy” hatred!
Bloodrayne: Revenge of the Butcheress
Will a single one shot be long enough to adequately capture the renewed conflict between two characters from a long-forgotten console video game? Perhaps the promise of “the catfight of the year” will distract you from trying to answer that question.
Orc Stain #1
So many easy jokes about WoW and personal hygiene that I’m just going to move on.
Political Power #4: Ronald Reagan
Fools! Don’t the people over at Blue Water Comics know that comics are an inadequate medium for conveying the true pathos of Ronald Reagan? The only methods deemed acceptable are Phil Hartman impersonation, slasher comedy, or horrifying puppet show.
Punisher Max: Get Castle #1
In this latest blood-soaked Punisher series, the beskulled antihero fights a group of international terrorists bent on retrieving a case of tiny steam-grilled cheeseburgers no matter the cost of human life in their way. Will the Punisher get to the case before the trigger-happy Euro trash? Will the secret of the chicken ring be revealed? Let’s read on.
This is the one I was talking about before where Soldier Field goes all boomy after a supervillain attack. Now if only they could do they same to Ford Field! Hah! Because the Detroit Lions are so bad! (I had to look up Ford Field.)
William Shatner Presents: Tek War #4
It’s Shatner, alright? Perhaps you have interest in upsetting a living god, but I do not. Thus I will be purchasing this title, turdball or not. You realize the man owns guns, don’t you?